Lunch breaks.

I've been slacking a bit with this blog. Which only makes me want to slack more... and be more indecisive about exactly what I want write about.

I decided to go to lunch early yesterday, before serving the leftovers from the elementary school to the patients. It was Friday, and Nic (my supervisor) was out of the office and like most days, around 11:30, I decided I needed a break. From the front desk, the beeping fax machine, the drives around the block in the red van to pick up patients. So I zipped my backpack and filled my water bottle and headed to Pioneer Square. Have I talked about the square yet? Across from the courthouse? The bricks, the water fountain, the Starbucks without a bathroom? The canvassers for international children's foundations lurking on every corner, who I politely (and somewhat self righteously) inform that I am already volunteering and only making $80 a month so will not be able to contribute financially, but approve and support of their cause? Pioneer square is 4 or so blocks south from where I work, that resembles a small brick stadium with nothing organized to look at. But most days, there are surprises--people spreading the word of Jesus to the disinterested crowd of professional twenty somethings eating their chinese noodles from environmentally friendly to-go boxes, a sun burnt man strumming on his guitar, field trips of third graders trading their potato chips, and festivals covering every heritage and every cause. I guess what I like about all of it is that I don't have to participate in any of the festivities. Friday was domestic abuse awareness week. There were fliers, and free coffee, and extra doughnuts. And I could be in another world without anyone asking for me.

This is what I like about being in a city, and what I like about working in the downtown area, that there is always something else going on. No matter how much I feel like I'm losing control of my responsibilities, how late I am to appointments, how frustrated I am with clients, or how frustrated they are with me--everything around us keeps going. The max rolls in and out, people sit on the brick steps eating their burritos, the fountain keeps running. It's a reminder, or an invitation to keep yourself open when you feel like everything is closing in on you.

So it was a good hour. Which may have had something to do with the free coffee, the surprise doughnut, the fact that Danielle (a JV living in MAC, the other Portland house) happened to be hanging out there in the late morning as well. We sat under the glass roof beside Starbucks. We did not take off our hoods. And I realized that there may be no such thing as perfect.